Sleazy 3 is the third (duh) group cruise I have done from New Orleans. Group members come from all over the country and most of them read r.t.c. or one of the various yahoo groups devoted to cruising. This year we had 86 people board the ship. Most of them spent one to three days prior to the cruise in New Orleans. I had arranged group space in two hotels... the St Marie (1/2 block off Bourbon Street) and the Drury (newer, business district). We had 22 people at the St. Marie and 45 at the Drury. Both hotels did a good job. I think the Drury was a better value but the location made the St. Marie a good choice, also and I stayed there. The Drury has a free breakfast and now offers every guest one hour per day of domestic long distance calls. The St. Marie has a "communications package" for $4.95 a day that includes unlimited local and domestic long distance calls and high speed internet cable access.

New Orleans used to have one of the most user-friendly passenger terminals. Plenty of parking, lots of porters, easy access. Not any more. Because of some construction, getting into the port can take over an hour in traffic. It now rivals New York for one of the worst ports and it is a shame. I don't know who thought up the current system of allowing only two lanes of traffic into the port including busses, trucks, cabs, shuttles and passenger cars, but he should be made to stand there from 8 AM to 3 PM every day a ship is in port so passengers can explain in person just how happy they are with the current situation. I tipped the cab driver generously for having to put up with this. A trip that normally would have taken 10 minutes took over an hour and a quarter. Even with the meter running, they aren't going to make much on a trip like this so if things don't improve, watch for the cabbies to start avoiding the port. That will REALLY help the situation. I recommend that if people are going to the port that they pack very light and take the trolley to the Julia Street station and walk the few remaining hundred yards to the terminal.

We arrived at the port at 12:30 PM only to find some people who were getting OFF the ship still waiting for transportation.

Once there, check-in was fast and efficient. Carnival has lots of desk agents on duty and there was no line. The whole process took just a few minutes. Of course, they were helped by the fact that passengers were finding it almost impossible to get to the terminal.

The Conquest is one BIG mother of a ship. For some reason, it feels even bigger than it is. For example, the Grand class Princess ships and the Voyager Class Royal Caribbean ships are larger... yet they "feel" smaller. I am sure it is just a matter of personal perspective but that is how it felt to me. Don't ask me about decor, rugs, wall coverings, upholstery or any of that because unless it is truly hideous, bland or outrageous... I don't pay much attention to things like that. I never go on a ship or stay away from a ship because of the way it is decorated. In over 40 cruises, the only ship I can remember where the decor detracted from my enjoyment of a cruise was on the Mercury. Oh... and the rust bucket ship that Commodore had... "Isle of Capri" or as I liked to call it, "Isle of Crappy".

Not much to mention about the cabins. They are pretty standard Carnival issue, 186 square feet. Minor changes in some features like a slightly smaller shower increases the over-all living space in the cabin. My balcony cabin had a sofa, plenty of storage and a small but useable balcony. I liked the storage drawers built into the bottoms of the sofa. The empty suitcases fit under the beds with no problem. Three closets, lots of shelf and drawer space, room safe, hair drier, all the usual stuff. Instead of the nice multi-colored tile-work Carnival used to have in the bathroom, much of the space is now a uniform aggregate faux-stone type of stuff. Not bad looking and easy to keep clean. OK... I did notice one glaring decor mistake. The bathroom is green..... but the shower curtain is bright pink (think Pepto-Bismol). Shower gel and shampoo dispensers in the shower... amenities "basket" containing free samples of various toiletries. While there is some pretty good stuff in these baskets, there is still something about a cruise line using free samples in this way that doesn't sit right with me. It is a minor point and I admit to enjoying using new items that I wouldn't ordinarily try.... but I still look at this and think to myself that it is pretty tacky.

There is one thing about the design of the Conquest that annoyed me. There are two dining rooms, each having two levels. The midship dining room makes getting to the aft of decks 3 and 4 an exercise in logistics. Many of us met in the evening for pre- and post- dinner drinks and conversation in the lobby bar on deck 3. To get from there to the aft dining room requires taking the elevator to deck 5, walking to the aft elevator/stair tower and then using the stairs or elevator to get back down to decks 3 and 4. I know other ships are like this but for some reason, it seems to be more intrusive on this ship.

Dining rooms were nice. A minor glitch with the group happened when Carnival would not allow me to request any tables larger than 8. When we got to the ship, a few of our tables were set for 8 people... at tables that would accommodate 10 people. That is just stupid. We shuffled some people around and things worked out pretty well but Carnival need to have better communication between groups, dining and the ship.

As long as we are in the dining room we might as well talk about food. In my opinion, Carnival now has the best food of any mass-market cruise line. In the past two years I have been on Carnival, Princess, NCL and Royal Caribbean and Carnival beats them all. Lobster tails were not mushy, beef dishes were served as ordered, soups were hot, salads were cold... even the coffee was good. A lot of people (including me) used to call Carnival the Macaroni and Cheese cruise line but things have changed. Putting it simply, Carnival is the leader in serving quality food in the mass market.... hands down.

The Lido Deck has various stations where different foods can be found. There is an International area where the menu changes daily. There is a Chinese food area, a NY Deli style area, a Fish and Chips area, A grill area (burgers, chicken breast, hot dogs, fries, steak sandwiches) and the pizza counter is open 24 hours. In the morning there is a made to order omelets station and during lunch there is always fresh carved roasts (the pork roast is VERY good). My favorite room service order is usually placed at midnight and consists of a BLT and plate of brownies/cookies. I ordered this three times during the cruise. The longest I waited was 20 minutes and one night, the order was delivered in an astonishingly short 5 minutes.

Dining room service was good... but it was not like it used to be. For example, I like iced tea with dinner, Becca likes lemons, Bea W. liked Skim milk. All were provided efficiently when asked for... but back in the "olden days" we would have never had to ask again after the first day. Our waiter Antonio was from India and had our table of 10 and another of 8. That is a good load for a waiter. Our "assistant waiter" was Slobodan from Macedonia and he had over 30 passengers to care for. That is way too many. The two of them worked well together and I don't think anyone at our table had any complaints about the service. I know I didn't.

BTW - this was one of the most fun groups of people to dine with. Me, Steve S., Lori K, Becca L, Brenda and Jeff D, Bea W., Joe and Becky D and Jean B had a wonderful time. It was like an extended family getting together at Holiday time with all the sharing and teasing we did.

Cabin service was very good. To me, the perfect cabin steward is never seen but the cabin is cleaned as if by magic and this one was. No problems in this area at all.

Entertainment was pretty good. Carnival continues to have large show bands and I like this. The main shows were well done even if the selection of songs wasn't my favorite. On thing there was a magician... Deja... from Las Vegas. Not very good in my opinion, but others liked her. The comedians that I saw were entertaining but nothing outstanding. None of the entertainment really stood out as being exceptional but all of it was good. The passenger talent show was a hoot.

Speaking of passengers, there was a gay and lesbian group of about 400 on this sailing. If you did not know ahead of time that they were going to be there, you would probably not have noticed anything unusual. All their group activities were private and by invitation only and I never saw any improper behavior in public. I did have a chance to meet and talk with the travel agent who booked this group and I was impressed with the job that he and his staff did. BTW - there was also a group of Bingo Players and a few other groups onboard the ship. I didn't see a single time when any group caused any inconvenience to other passengers.

Price increases: I did notice that some of the onboard prices have gone up substantially. Laundering a shirt is now $4. It wasn't so long ago that it was $2.50. The Coke drink card is now $38 + 15%. It used to be $27 + 15%. The "drink of the day has gone from $2.50 to $2.95. A few members of the group told me that during the cruise, Carnival changed the amount of time on the driers in the laundry from 40 minutes to 20 minutes for the same amount of money. One way bus transfers from the ship to the airport are now $23 pp. I believe they used to be $13 pp. I seldom drink but the souvenir drink that used to be $4.75 now seems to be around $6. FWIW, most of this stuff doesn't affect me but it is an indication about which way the cruise industry is heading and not just on Carnival.

Ports: We were one of the first ships back into Grand Cayman after Hurricane Ivan. I wanted to get away from the city area to see what damage has been done so Becca and I took the public bus system. To get a bus you walk left from the tender pier, turn right at Colombian Emeralds and go the Post Office where you turn left and walk 2 blocks. The bus area is there and there is a person who will explain the system to you. Basically, there are two "loops"... east and west. The west loop takes about one hour to complete and the east about twice that. The fare is $2.50 US for the west and $5 US for the east. You pay this fare no matter how long you stay on the bus... so you can ride the entire loop for one fare. If you get off, you pay another fare when you get back on. There are lots of bus stations along the main roads but the buss will stop anywhere if you wave to the driver. These vans are small and cramped but the people and drivers were friendly. The countryside in Grand Cayman is devastated. The hardest to replace damage is the large, old trees that have literally been uprooted and flattened. Thousands of palms are gone as well as other varieties. Things grow fast in the Caribbean climate so the underbrush and smaller plans will come back quickly but the big trees will take years to re-establish. Whole buildings are gone. Many of the stores in the surrounding areas are closed as are many of the hotels. I think that by the end of the year that the island will be mostly back in business but it will be a long time before they recover from this storm.

In Jamaica many of us went to Sunset Beach Resort and I have to admit, this was a very pleasant surprise! For $20 pp, you get a day pas that allows you full access to the grounds and includes all food and beverages. There are three swimming pools, hot tubs, a snack bar, a restaurant, three beaches, all kinds of lounge chairs and umbrellas and the facilities are very clean. Some members of our group had heard about this deal and when I was unable to verify it, I was skeptical... but it is a great deal. Bus fare was $2 pp each way. We had 21 people from our group in our bus and others took shuttles and cabs there. No problem, Mon. I think this is one of the best day trip deals in the Caribbean.

Cozumel is my favorite port in the Caribbean. Ten of us from our group went to play miniature golf. http://www.eagleraydivers.com/minigolf.htm. What a great place and very well maintained. The fee is $7 pp and you get a radio to carry that you can use to call and order drinks which are delivered to you on the course. At the 9th hole, a man comes out with ice cold washcloths to help refresh you. I am not a big fan of miniature golf but we all had a lot of fun at this place. I also made a stop at the American Discount Drugstore http://gocozumel.com/pharmacy/ where I thumbed my nose at the US Pharmaceutical industry by buying medicines for 25% to 50% of the prices charged here in the states. The owner of this store is also the head of the Cozumel Humane Society http://gocozumel.com/humane.htm and many members of the group cruises help support this charity.

I believe that a successful group cruise has three components. The first is the travel agent who sets the stage, creates anticipation and excitement and provides guidance, help and amenities that enhance the experience. The second is the ship and the value and quality of the product delivered by the cruise line.

The third and most important are the group members who volunteer to help with events etc, and who participate. I was awestruck by the level of participation on this group cruise. 86 members... 30 volunteers, 75 people at the Bon Voyage Dinner Party, 85 people at the cocktail party and 100% group participation in the Halloween Costume party. I have done many groups including 2 GGC's and was a passenger on 3 other GGC's and I have never seen this level of participation on any other group cruise. In a word, it was AWESOME! The friendship and camaraderie on this group was wonderful. It was a pleasure from start to finish and I would cruise with any of these people again in a New York minute. It is when I do groups like these that I know that I have the best job in the world.

I would just like to once again thank Dawn Gorsuch for what was an outstanding job in organizing the Halloween Costume Party. Like I said, every person in our group attended and everyone seemed to be having a great time. Dawn's planning and execution with help from her family and other volunteers made this one of the most memorable group activities that I have ever attended.

It truly was the best of times.
--
George Leppla
http://www.countryside-travel.com