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Bo Vance

Age: 25

Occupation:REALTOR

Number of Cruises: 1

Cruise Line: Carnival

Ship: Carnival Imagination

Sailing Date: October 14th,2002

Itinerary: Western Caribbean

AIRPORT AND TRANSPORT
We arrived at the Miami airport at 11:30AM. We easily found our luggage and there were Carnival reps waiting for us at the baggage claim. The reps were hard to understand with there accents but still managed to keep order. We were told that we would need to walk a block and a half to get to the buses that would take us to the port. We follow the reps down the sidewalk towards our buses. Over half of the crowd decides to smoke at this time. So here we are walking in this huge cloud of smoke. This really sucks if you don't smoke. We get to the station where the buses are and we are asked to show our IDs and transport tickets. It was soooooooooo crowded and people are still smoking like its going out of style (which I hope it is.) We get on our bus and the driver tells us he is Jamaican and he will be taking us to the port. He also mentions that the mic is broken so he will have to yell. If you take the route we did you will pass the Orange Bowl and the arena where the Miami Heat plays. We pull into the port after about a 15 minute, NON SMOKING, air conditioned ride.

EMBARKATION
We are setting on the bus while they unload our luggage. Believe me people they are not easy with it. As the luggage is being unloaded the bus driver will tell you over and over how his tips are not include in your tour package. After a 10 minute wait we got off the bus. We watched the porters take our luggage and tipped the bus driver. We entered the building and waited in line for about 10 minutes to get through the metal detector. The security people were very nice and the rubber glove was more than pleasant (just kidding.) The physically challenged were allowed to go ahead of everyone which was appropriate however one guy was really rude and was pushing through everyone. Sometimes you just wish you were standing on a steep incline. We get through the detectors with no problem and get into another line. This time we are waiting to get on board and to activate our sail and sign cards. There were at least 20-30 Carnival reps working. This went fairly quick. The reps were very friendly! You have to give them your tickets to get on board and a credit card to activate your card. PLEASE HAVE THIS STUFF READY, it makes the line move faster. You will walk up a flight of stairs and there will be a table set up. You will then receive your sail and sign card and your cabin keys. After you get your card you will get your picture taken for security purposes. Then you come to another security guard and they will check that your name on your card and your ID are the same. We then walked down a long hallway and are greeted by a camera man. CHEESE! Welcome aboard.

GETTING ON BOARD
So we are finally on the ship. Its about 12:45. We found our cabin and tucked away our belongings. My wife and I tried to get naughty for our 5th anniversary but my mother knocked on the door (just like high school) The safe works just as promised. We played around with the TV (instead of each other) for a bit but couldn't figure out the Funvision. (Funvision is the Carnival channel that has a schedule and also lets you check your balance. I am so excited that I just have to eat so we hear to the Lido deck to the Horizon Grill. The line is short and fast. I tried a hamburger and it was descent (7 out of 10). I needed a drink so I tried the tea (1 out of 10). I would rather drink toilet water in Cozumel than to drink that crap again. I switched to lemonade (9 out of 10) and was hooked.

LIFE BOAT DRILL
The life boat drill started around 4:30. Our cabins had to report to the Dynasty lounge. This was horrible. They gave us life jackets and showed us how to put them on. We were then escorted to our life boat stations and stood out there while they told us if the ship started sinking we are to remain calm. Uhhh ok. This lasted probably 20 minutes. Too long.

CRUISE CRITIC PALS
We set sail at around 5:00PM. People were all over the place. We walked to the curiosity library and met with some fellow cruise critic users. Buddy and Janet are very nice. We also met a lady named Molly and her 2 kids, along with her mother. They were very nice but we never saw them again. We sat around and talked to Buddy and Janet for about and hour. They are wonderful people and a pleasure to cruise with. If you meet people online I strongly suggest making a meeting time. Its always good to make new friends.

PRIDE EARLY DINING 6:15
Ok I didn't pick the dinner time. My mother who cruised with us picked the time but this was too early. We stood outside the dining hall for about 20 minutes waiting to get in. We finally made it and took a seat at table 142, a table set for 6. We knew everyone at the table as they came with us Tom Charma, Jason, Amy, Mary (my wife) and Bo (Me!) Our assistant waiter came by to say Hi. His name was Han and he is from Thailand. We tried to make conversation but....oh well. Our waitress came by and she was hot! She was from Romania and her name was something like Ladonna or something. WOW! She took our order and I ordered the barley soup, salad and lamb chops. The barley soup (7 of 10) came out about 10 minutes later. All we had was water, no beverage service as of yet. The salads came and they were ok. Everyone that ordered the ranch dressing hated it. I got French so I was somewhat satisfied (6 0f 10). Next came the lamb chops and they were beautiful! I couldn't believe how pretty they were and they tasted very good (9 of 10). My wife tried the NY Strip and she was satisfied. They brought us a dessert menu and I ordered the chocolate decadence. If you do not like VERY RICH CHOCOLATE do not order this. It was good (7 of 10). We never did get the beverage service.

FUN TIME
We went to the Dynasty Lounge and watched the welcome aboard stuff. This was kind of boring. They had bingo ready to start and we bought 3 cards for $20. They played 2 games. The first was for $200 and the second for $500. I lost. They played some game show games this evening and they were pretty funny They were giving away trophies or as the assistant cruise director David called them "24 karat gold, plastic ship on a stick" They played 3 games for the trophy then a game with the winners of the 1st three for a bottle of champagne. Buddy (who we met on cruise critic) won although he thought the happy birthday song was played at weddings. We also watched a dance class. They learned the Cha Cha. It was funny to watch some people with 2 left feet. We also got our first taste from the "GODFATHER OF COMEDY" EDDY CAPONE. He was very clean and very funny.

WASTING TIME/ DRINKING
We walked around the ship for a while and drank a few. Ok, I am not a big drinker but some of these drinks were watered down. I also paid 4 bucks for a warm can of beer at the pool bar (4 of 10) We also tried the strawberry daiquiri (7 of 10)

THE MIDNIGHT BUFFET/ BEDTIME

So we get to the buffet and get in line. We had to wait 5 minutes or so. I tried the hot wings (8 of 10), the roasted potatoes (9 of 10) and the BBQ Ribs (10 0f 10!) I'm stuffed, so we head to the room for some naughty time. Our beds were turned down with a mint on the pillow. No world famous towel animals. A basket of goodies was left. ( a razor, some shampoo, some soap, some Tylenol) I cant believe my wife and I are finally alone. Oh yeah. KNOCK KNOCK....."what mom?" Mother: "What time do you want me to get you up?" Uggghhh HINT #1 Pretend you are not in the room when your mom knocks on the door at 1:30AM!

DAY 2 10-15-02 FUN DAY AT SEA

BREAKFAST

We slept through the Dining room breakfast and went to the grill for the breakfast buffet. I tried the eggs, sausage, bacon, and hash browns (all together a 6 0f 10, the hash browns only get a 3 of 10)

GAMES IN THE LOUNGE/ SHORE TOUR SEMINAR
They played trivia in the lounge. This was kind of boring and people were cheating everywhere. Really unorganized. The assistant cruise director Dominica is great! Our Cruise Director AJ came out and started the Excursion talk. He advised everyone to take a tour in Belize. He went over the main tours and told us what to expect. This lasted about a hour....BORING. You can buy your excursions on Funvision in your cabin if you can figure it out. HINT #2 THE SHORE EXCURSION SEMINAR IS A WASTE OF TIME TO SEE LIVE, IT WILL BE ON TV ALL WEEK LONG CONTINUOUSLY

LUNCH TIME
We went and had the pizza. (9 of 10) Very good and quick. We stopped at the pool side bar and bought a SODA CARD $24.95. This entitles one person to a shot glass full of coke whenever you want. That's about the truth. You can use them anywhere but if you use one of the waiters they will roll they're eyes and take forever to get it. Kind of a hassle. Would be great if you had kids!

THE TOPLESS DECK
So my wife and I are looking for a place to lay out and cant find a lounger. We then pass a set of stairs that says adults only. We go up and discover the topless deck. I had no problem getting topless nor did my wife. There are way too many single men walking around on this deck. Perverts. Yeah, like we really believe your are lost. Plenty of loungers for everyone. People are very nice. It was very windy. I had my shirt off for 15 minutes without sunscreen.........HINT #3 WEAR SUNSCREEN! YOU MAY BURN! That hurt.

THE SURVIVOR GAME
We went to the dynasty lounge to watch SURVIVOR carnival style. They chose 10 people from a drawing and they were invited on stage and put in 2 teams of 5. They then played games for immunity. The host asked each player what they did and where they're from. One guy worked for Carnival! Some lady named Sue was wearing a bikini top. ooohhh la la. Some dude named Larry won. It was funny.

BINGO
I played bingo...I lost.

FORMAL DINNER
We didn't go. Were not into that kind of stuff. The hallways are packed and you can hardly walk. Everywhere you turn they are taking pictures. We decided to go to the room to get out of the way. If you don't get dressed up YOU WILL FEEL INFERIOR! I make good money and live very comfortably but if you put someone in a tuxedo beside a man in Bermuda shorts, they do treat you like a peasant. Some people have real ego problems.

DINNER
We went to the buffet (surprise!) and tried some stuff. They had veal stroganoff which I didn't try (see hint #4) I had some kind of pasta (5 of 10) and some potatoes (8 of 10). There were 8 people in our party, 6 had the veal (neither my wife nor I ate it). They all got diarrhea. LOL Mary and I were fine. HINT #4 DO NOT EAT THE VEAL STROGANOFF UNLESS YOU HAVE A LOT OF TIME AND SOMETHING TO READ LATER THAT NIGHT

THE MAIN SHOW- IMAGINE IT
We had to sit in the top balcony. The drink service was pretty good however the Margaritas were weak. My wife ordered a Miami Vice which is a pina colda, daiquiri mix. We used the coke card a gain and it took forever. The show was ok. The lead singer was named SUSAN...sound familiar? She was in the Survivor game earlier. CARNIVAL should prohibit employees from playing the games. This show was ok (6 of 10) About half way through the show a Russian couple came out and did a dance type thing. The woman was very flexible and they were amazing! (10 of 10 for the dancing Russians) We left the show and went to the casino. HINT # 5 GET TO THE SHOW 1 HOUR OR EARLIER TO GET A GOOD SEAT

CASINO
I'm not a big gambler. My wife headed to the nickel slots and lost a quick $10. I stood waiting to get a seat at a blackjack table but a seat never came up. There are probably 20 tables in the casino, maybe half were open
oh well.

THE EDDY CAPONE R RATED SHOW (R Rated Review) We went to the Xanadu lounge and got a front row seat to the Eddy Capone show (10 0f 10). The had a warning announcement before the show about the foul language. How bad could it be? Eddy Capone came out and immediately started to single out people in the crowd and made fun of them (including me) He said, "smile you f*ck face. He was very vulgar and very, very funny. There was an elderly couple in the front row who spoke no English. He gave them a very hard time and they had no idea what he was saying. Funny. Near the end he asked the men what they call they're penis. Some of the names were Elvis, Johnson, Woody, Big Boy, Willy etc..................then he asked the ladies what they call they're spouses penis, then some lady said, " I don't call it....it just comes" WOW! That was a good one. Eddie ended the show by singing Good Bless the USA. I had 7 Fuzzy Navals and a few beers. visit Eddie at godfatherofcomedy.com HINT #6 GO SEE EDDY CAPONE! HE IS VERY FUNNY! IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE DO NOT GO! HE WILL MAKE FUN OF YOU. NO ONE IS
SAFE!

BUFFET

Ok....I know you're saying you just ate. We got to the buffet and had...get this, PRIME RIB! Oh yeah(10 0f 10)

BEDTIME
We went back to the room and got our first towel animal, a frog. The beds were turned down and a mint on the pillow. Good Nite!

WEDNESDAY 10-16-02 PORT BELIZE CITY, BELIZE

MORNING

Knock Knock....My mother again. She said to get up. We did and looked out our window and saw a beautiful view of the waters around Belize. Naughty Time (9 of 10). Shower (fits 2 people by the way) We ordered room service the night before for this morning. They wheeled it in early. A Bagel and a milk. (4 of 10) A mans gotta eat.

BREAKFAST
We went to the breakfast buffet. The bagel just didn't do it. Same thing as yesterday. I tried an omelet which was pretty good (8 of 10). The announcement came over the intercom that the ship was cleared and you needed to meet with your excursion host in the designated spot.

GULF CAY SNORKELING
We had to meet in the Dynasty lounge at 9:45. They exited row by row to get on the tenders. The front row goes first. HINT #7 SIT IN THE 1ST ROW AND LEAVE FIRST FOR THE TENDERS. We went down the steps to get on the tender. Make sure you have ID and sail and sign card ready. We got on the tender and which fit around 30 people. Carnival says it is a 40 minute ride to the Gulf Caye snorkeling excursion, the tender ride was around 15 minutes and was worth the price of the excursion itself. We got to the Caye and had to wade to shore or you can stay on the boat and they will take you to deeper waters. HINT #8 WEAR SWIM SHOES BECAUSE THE ROCKS ARE SHARP, ALSO BRING TOWELS (CARNIVAL PROVIDED), SUNSCREEN, WATERPROOF CAMERA, A HAT, SUNGLASSES AND CASH The island they take you to would fit easily inside the Dynasty lounge. The waters are crystal clear and they are no waves. They have a small hut set up where you can buy souvenirs from Belize. HINT #9 SOUVENIRS WERE CHEAPER HERE THAN IN BELIZE CITY. They also have a hotdog stand that sells food and beer. A beer and hotdog is $5. The Belize beer is called BELIKIN and it is good. HINT # 10 TRY BELIKIN BEER, TASTES A LOT LIKE HEINEKEN. Ok here is what sucked about this excursion. Here you are sitting on this little island with crystal clear waters. They have porta potties set up in case you ate the veal yesterday (see hint #4) which are pretty clean. There are also people from Norwegian Cruise lines on the beach with you and guess what.....while you are eating a $3 hotdog they are eating a catered lunch that Norwegian Cruise Lines provided. BBQ Chicken, potato salad etc. That was a let down. They also had free water and free RUM PUNCH! They were also provided chairs...we set on the hot sand. So were setting on this beautiful beach and this weird looking boat pulls up. It looked like a hut with lawn chairs and lots of shade. It was the N.C.L's bathrooms with flushable toilets and loungers! UGGHHHH All in all the island was beautiful (9 of 10) and the beer was great (9 of 10). Carnival needs to cater a lunch or at least a picnic lunch. This is a very good excursion of you want to see some beautiful water do some snorkeling and see some fish and the reef. I give it a strong 9 of 10. The boat ride gets a 10 of 10 and the guides get a 10 of 10. They were very funny and gave us a history lesson on Belize.

TENDERING BACK TO IMAGINATION AND TO BELIZE CITY We took the tender back to the ship and changed clothes. We took another tender to Belize City. This ride took about 15 minutes (Carnival claimed it took 45 minutes) and you can get some great pictures of the Imagination. We arrived to the shore and got off the tender. There are around 30 shops right on the dock in the visitor area. You can buy many Belizean artifacts. Lots of carved wood items and jewelry. The people are not pushy at all. HINT # 11 DON'T PAY FULL PRICE...THESE PEOPLE ARE EASY TO HAGGLE DOWN. I TALKED A GUY DOWN ON A HAND CARVED PIPE FROM $65 TO $30. THEY NEED THE MONEY The shops are crowded so be careful. You break, you buy. There is a pharmacy in port and you can buy drugs without a prescription. Some stuff was 70% cheaper than US prices. Viagra is $6 a pill. You cant get it up here for that price (no pun intended) Wanna try some ethnic food? Try Taco Creole in the plaza on port. A taco (which is half the size of a taco bell taco) cost $2 but they are hotter than hell! Also try the nachos at the internet cafe. HINT #12 TRY THE NACHOS AT THE INTERNET CAFE, $3 GETS YOU A BUNCH OF FRESH WARM TORTILLA CHIPS AND SOME REALLY FRESH HOT CHEESE You can see all the shops in about and hour. There are quite a few people performing on the street. You can see Belize City from the port. It is very poor and looks like hell. The people are very friendly. We got back on the tender and headed back to the ship at 3:00PM. The last tender leaves at 4:15 and they will leave you. HINT #13 MAKE IT BACK TO THE SHIP ON TIME OR YOU WILL BE LEFT BEHIND

BACK TO THE SHIP
We got back to the ship and ordered room service. I had a ham sandwich (9 of 10) and some milk. I took a nap till 5:00 and was awaken by my mother. We showered and got ready for dinner at 6:15 (too early) HINT #14 TIP THE ROOM SERVICE PEOPLE, THEY DO A GREAT JOB

OTHER SHORE TOURS
Ok, We only went on the Gulf Caye Snorkeling Tour so Imp only giving you hear say. Some people we were with went on other tours and this is what we were told. HORSEBACK RIDING- We were told it was long, painful and hot. They said a person who has never rode a horse may want to skip this. Great views of the jungle. Good food at the end. WARNING- The people on this tour had to run back to make the last tender to the ship! CAVE TUBING- The most popular tour. We were told it was really pretty and a lot of fun. But you have to be in relatively good shape. They said the bus ride was horrible then you have to walk through the rain forest. They had a good time but also had to hurry to the last tender and had no time to shop. BELIZE CITY TOUR- They said this was a humbling experience. Its not everyday you see this much poverty. It could be a life changing tour or it could be a 3 hour waste of time. RIVERBOAT RIDES- The most I heard was its ok. RUIN TOURS- We were told it was pretty good but you have to like that kind of stuff. Long ride on crowded bus. SHARK RAY ALLEY- Deep water snorkeling. They said that its not what you think. They said its better in the Caymans. NO TOUR- Ride the tender, shop, go back to the ship. If you want to shop do this but DO NOT GO INTO THE CITY!

DINNER- PRIDE EARLY SEATING
Our waitress welcomed us back and briefly asked about Belize. Han filled my water glass and after 3 days the beverage person finally showed their face. It was this cute lil' oriental girl. Mary ordered a coke with her SODA CARD and 10 minutes later she had a coke. The girl read her name off the card and began to call her Miss Mary. Mary liked that. I had the duck starter and the Roast Chicken main course. The duck was horrible (1 of 10) ,it tasted like raw bacon (which is probably at least a 2 of 10). The roasted chicken was really good (9 of 10) and came with some potatoes. Mary had a tenderloin. It was the size of a quarter. She had to order chicken also just to have something to eat. Dessert was apple pie for most, I had mud river cake which was a piece of white cake sitting in chocolate milk (3 of 10). The maiter de was ok. He walked around and talked to all the tables except ours...very disappointing. HINT #15 IF THE MAITER DE FORGETS TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU, FORGET TO TIP HIM

MAIN SHOW- MAGIC
We pretty much ran to the main show. In front of the Dynasty Lounge the are many little shops including a duty free liquor store. They had a table set up and were giving away free shots of liquor that you can buy. I was in line and the crowd was huge. There was some pushing and shoving and then some A-Hole knocked the free liquor table over busting several bottles of rum. They ruined it for everyone. The show started and the magician came out. He was pretty good, he did some cool card tricks and used the audience a few times. He had some assistants wearing thongs (10 of 10 for the thongs) that I was more than happy with. The magic show was good (7 0f 10) but could have been better. After that show a comedian came out. I think his name was Kenny Something? He was funny and did a G Rated show. He played some guitar and did a song or two. That show was a (7 0f 10). I went and walked around a bit with my beautiful wife. We went to the front of the ship and watched the ship cut through the waters in the moonlight. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever saw (10 of 10) Only one thing could make this night anymore special......not naughty time but.....HINT #16 GET THERE EARLY FOR A GOOD SEAT

...MIDNIGHT BUFFET
We headed to the buffet and had some steak and roasted potatoes. (7 of 10)

BEDTIME
We decided to go back to the room and skip the Lido Deck party which I heard was boring. The beds were turned down and we had a towel pig on our bed. I fell asleep immediately.

THURSDAY- FUN DAY AT SEA 10-17-02

BREAKFAST

We grabbed breakfast at the buffet and I discovered the fence toast is really good (9 0f 10) The service was descent.

SHOPPING TALK
We went to the dynasty lounge and sit through another boring talk on what to buy and where to buy it at Key West. This lasted about and hour. HINT # 17 SIT NEAR THE FRONT BECAUSE THIS GUY GIVES OUT FREE STUFF He throws out T-shirts, necklaces, rum cakes (I got a rum cake) and other crap. You can also watch this on TV all week long.

WASTING TIME- HAIRY CHEST CONTEST/ ICE SCULPTURE
We walked around for a while and stumbled upon a hairy chest contest on Lido deck. They take 6 guys and they get shirtless. They then pick a woman to judge. All of these men we hideous. HINT #18 DO NOT EAT BEFORE WATCHING THIS SHOW AS IT COULD BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH They should call it the hairy back contest. The men had to dance over to the lady and use a pick up line. Some nasty looking dude won with a lame pickup line like "Do you cruise here often?" I preferred "hey baby wanna ride on my fun ship?" They had an ice sculpture demonstration here too. Kind of boring (5 of 10) but worth seeing. We laid in the sun for a while then got in the hot tub. We met one of the Survivor contestants from Boston. She was nice. There was an older couple in the tub and the man was picking dead skin off his wife and releasing it into the tub! HINT #19 IF SOMEONE IS PICKING OFF DEAD SKIN INTO THE HOT TUB, SMACK THEM VERY HARD

BACK TO THE CASINO
We headed to the casino and played roulette. I lost a quick $20.

THE GALLEY TOUR- KITCHEN FOR YE' LAND FOLKS If you've been in a restaurant kitchen you've been in the ships kitchen. (4 of 10)

THE LOVE QUIZ AND THE NEWLYWED GAME
We got to the Dynasty Lounge late but we sit with our new friends from Boston. The love quiz (5 of 10) was pretty funny. I, of course, lost. I mean what kind of man is escorted by his mom on his 5th wedding anniversary cruise. The winner got a bottle of champagne. The winner was Janet, our cruise critic pal! For the newlywed game they took the couple who was married the longest( which was 61 years) the youngest marriage (3 days) and the middle, Buddy and Janet again (they must pay off someone to get picked all the time) they were married 30 some years. This old couple was so funny. He didn't understand any of the questions. The last question was "If your we stranded on a island, who would you'd rather have...a missionary or a hooker?" The old man answered, "A hooker in the missionary position!" They all won champagne

DINNER- PRIDE EARLY SEATING
We get there and have a seat. The lil' beverage girl automatically brought Mary a drink and called her Miss Masy again. I had the chicken tortilla starter(6 of 10), a salad (6 of 10) and some beef thing(6 of 10) Desert was a cake with thick icing(9 of 10) The waiters and kitchen staff started a conga line around the dining room. It was really cool.

MAIN SHOW- BEE BOP
We ran like the wind and got a pretty good seat. This was the best show yet(10 of 10) They played hits from the 50's, 60's, 70's and 80's. Many costume changes and lots of pyro and lasers. I would skip dinner to get a good seat at this show! HINT #20 GET A GOOD SEAT EARLY TO THIS SHOW....BY FAR THE BEST SHOW By this time the bar staff knew our favorite drinks.

VIDEO DIARY

I heard there was a video diary team on board but we never saw them. What a disappointment. My wife and I had our camera so we took it around and filmed the ship.

WASTING TIME
We wasted some time on the lido deck and listened to the Caribbean sounds of the band 'Ocean" (9 of 10) They were good. We then walked down to the promenade to hear this rock band that was supposed to play at 10:30. They we horrible. They called themselves rock but all they played was Barbara Streisand and Tony Bennett. HINT #21 SKIP THE "ROCK BAND"

LATE NIGHT COMEDY WITH KENNY SOMETHING? We got there early and set in the front row again. We once again got the warning about the language. This guy was very funny (10 of 10) and also made fun of people and what they were drinking. He also played some tunes. HINT #22 SIT IN THE FRONT IF YOU WANT INVOLVED IN THE SHOW

BUFFET
As usual. Same old same old. Went for pizza also. Damn good this time (9 of 10)

BEDTIME
On the way to bed we stopped at the front of the ship again. It was so windy you couldn't stand up. We got back to the room and had a towel elephant. We then laid in bed and watching "Like Mike" starring the wonderful, oscar winning actor Lil Bow Wow...LOL.....actually a cute movie.

FRIDAY- PORT KEY WEST, FL 10-18-02

MORNING-
Naughty time.

BREAKFAST- Guess where we went? Buffet! Had the French toast again (10 of 10) That's good stuff.

GETTING OFF THE SHIP
We didn't get an excursion for Key West because we just wanted to shop. If you were not a US citizen you had to be in the Dynasty Lounge at 7:30 for immigration so they could clear the ship and we could get off. Some moron named Isabella in cabin u60 (they announced it 50 times) was late. We were finally cleared at 9:15 and some people were late for their excursions. Thanks Isabella, America already despises you. HINT #23 LEARN ENGLISH BEFORE YOU COME ON BOARD IF YOU ARE FOREIGN We finally got off after standing in a long line. Took about an hour. We road a trolley to downtown and shopped a while. Carnival was selling trolley excursions that toured all of key west in a hour for $29 on board. They are 1.5 hours if you buy them on shore and only $20 HINT #24 BUY YOU'RE KEY WEST TROLLEY TOUR ON BOARD...TAKE THE CONCH TRAIN TOUR You get to see all the sites on this and the guides are very knowledgeable and friendly. We tried to go to Sloppy Joes for lunch but the place was packed. The Bull was also crowded but the had an Elvis Impersonator. We ate at Burger King. We made it back to the ship around 3:00 and customs searched our trolley. I got t all on video.

DISEMBARK TALK
We went to this talk and it sucked. AJ was funny but it just made people aware that your vacation was almost over. A real downer.

DINNER- PRIDE EARLY SEATING Prime Rib and baked potato (10 of 10) and some kind of pudding for dessert. All the staff got together and sang GOD BLESS THE USA. Very touching. HINT #25 TIP YOUR WAITRESS AND STAFF EXTRA IF THEY DID A GOOD JOB

MAIN SHOW- TALENT SHOW
This was really good. The 1st guy did some Willie Nelson, some lady did opera, a guy played harmonica, someone did Perry Cuomo, some dude did a sing a long, another lady did Streisand (ugggh) and then these two ladies got up and did a horrific Whitney Houston...they knew it was bad...they were laughing." I believe our children are the future...."

GAME SHOW and BINGO
I lost at bingo...again and they did the game show again.

LATE NIGHT COMEDY- X RATED
They had some guy come in to do late nite comedy again. He was a long haired dude and he did some magic. It was horrible. He should be fired. I didn't laugh once and most of the people walked out. All he did was f*ck every other word and laugh at his own jokes. HINT # 26 IF THIS LONG HAIRED GUY IS THEIR WATCH IT BECAUSE YOU CAN TELL YOUR FRIENDS YOU SAW THE WORST COMIC EVER

BUFFET-
Chinese food or something (2 of 10) Didn't look good at all.

BEDTIME- HAPPY ANNIVERSARY
Do I even have to tell you. Actually you have to pack your crap and leave it in the hallway. Make sure you leave out some clothes for Saturday, your ID and sail and sign card. Naughty time.

SATURDAY- PORT MIAMI 10-19-02
Got ready and went to the breakfast buffet. They could have something different on the buffet just once. But as always, I had the French toast. We heard an announcement saying that our cabins could get off the ship.

LEAVING THE SHIP
Make sure you have your sail and sign card and your customs declaration page ready. We found our luggage and drug it out. Lots of rude people pushing and shoving. We made it off the ship in about 20 minutes and got on the bus to the airport. HINT #26 WATCH THEM PUT YOUR LUGGAGE ON THE BUS Some lady lost a garment bag with a cocktail dress and a tux because she didn't do this. Bus ride to the airport takes 20 minutes. Took about 30 minutes to check our luggage. Our flight didn't leave until 7:00 PM so we shopped and walked around.

Well people that's it. I was as detailed as I could be. I hope you enjoyed. If you have any questions or comments write me at c21vance@aol.com. I would love to hear from anyone. I am going to book another cruise for the spring this week.

Bo & Mary Vance Hurricane, WV



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