As this was our 5th cruise we did a lot of comparing. We’ve taken 2 on Carnival, one on the Grand Princess and one on the “Big Red Boat” when it was the Disney line.

We (19 of us, age 9mo. to 60 something) had a row of inside cabins on deck 3, with the exception of the matriarch and patriarch in a suite on deck 8. Paw Paw and Granny paid and, by golly, deserve the best. I actually prefer the interior cabins. You can get a view of the ocean all over the ship and several of the cabin windows I’ve seen tend to get fogged up in the humid air or salt water deposits on the outside. If you appreciate a dark room to sleep in, the interior rooms look like midnight even at noon. Nevertheless, these cabins were “cozy” as my son put it. There was just enough drawer space, a fairly large closet, plenty of lights, and well controlled AC. Although the cabins on Carnival are often garishly decorated, they are also often larger. Larger TV on the Carnival, but better picture and more programming in this cabin.

The most interesting place on the Rhapsody is the Solarium pool. It has the look and feel of some ancient Roman bath but is decorated with statues all around which look like Pharaoh sarcophaguses. The towel stand and other items look like fixtures from a pyramid, as well. The gold and white marble tiled floor hasn’t been polished shiny smooth, but has the texture left on it. So while it looks ancient, it also prevents you from slipping on wet marble. The pool itself is churned near the steps by water/air pumps which creates a current in the pool allowing you to swim in place….a good thing since the pool isn’t that large.

The 2 Jacuzzis in the solarium pool were usually not crowded and quite comfortable. One thing I hate in a swimming pool is cold water. On Carnival and Princess, the water was cold water right from the sea. This pool was perfect. But, Carnival has the waterslide and most ships I’ve seen have more pools. Rhapsody could at least have a toddler pool. 2 isn’t enough. This is a pool for 16 and up but would have been better as a 21 and up. There were a couple of teenaged Rexall rangers with their cowboy hats on that decided to splash into the pool, hats and all. Still, this was a much better alternative to the main pool which seemed to have more people in it than water.

Food. On par with our other cruises. To me, that means fancy sounding and looking dishes with nice preparation, but flavor was still closer to Lubys than The Mansion (insert your towns finest restaurant here) or even TGI Fridays, for that matter. Most of the family loved the food and a couple are FREQUENT cruisers. I’m not finicky but am quite critical. The best meal I had was tilapia in a coconut curry sauce for lunch in the dining room. In the same meal was baked sweet potato soup….delicious. There was the option for steak, salmon, Caesar salad, and a couple of others at dinner every night. I usually had the Caesar which was so so. Others in our family tried the steak with favorable opinions. Most of us had prime rib on formal night #2, and most of us loved it. They usually liked the deserts and loved the Bananas Foster which was prepared at our table by the head waiter. I, however, have been spoiled by my wife’s superior southern cooking. All deserts worth eating contain ample amounts of butter, sugar, and sometimes salt and vanilla. So keep that in mind as you assess my culinary critique. The apple strudel prepared for the cooking demo looked wonderful…..needed more butter and sugar. The pies and cakes did, too. The mousse was ok. Ice cream was good – Blue Bell is better. Still would much rather have a good crème brulee, my wife’s pecan pie, a chocolate zinger (before they new and improved them) or even a bowl of melted butter, dark brown sugar and pecans, ooh yeah, a meal in Paradise!

As usual, food was always available somewhere, but the buffet and hamburger/pizza lines weren’t constantly open. The only thing I ate at the buffet in the Windjammer other than breakfast was some bowtie pasta with olives, olive oil, pancetta, mushrooms, garlic, parmesan and peppers. It was tasty. The only breakfast I had in the dining room was Eggs Benedict. Good but needed more/stronger Hollandaise.

Surprisingly, my recollection of the food on Carnival is better. I was really surprised. I suspect a smaller ship on a more expensive line would have better food, although my parents recently went on a Seabourn in the Mediterranean and the food was poor.

Las Vegas would be my vacation in The Bad Place. Broadway musicals might equate to purgatory. I’m not a big drinker, nor dancer. Therefore, I have no comment on the casino, nor the song and dance shows (other than that they were well produced). There were 4 comedy acts, one including juggling. Every one got me laughing…mark me happy in that category. Scott Parham (sp?) in the Schooner bar sings and plays guitar with some pre-recorded/programmed backup. He covers mostly classic rock, some country and a few recent numbers. We liked him the best. I also enjoyed the solo jazz guitar player and the ships show band was tight, polished and sounded great. Karaoke was fun to watch.

For excursions, do not miss the stingrays in Grand Cayman. It may look crowded but there are plenty of those "big portobello mushrooms" swimming around for everyone. In Cozumel, Playa Sol Beach was a good choice. Nice clean beach, incluced non-motorized water sports, included drinks (and bottled water) and an optional buffet. They also rent water bikes, shorkel equipment and offer scuba diving. The "Intro to Scuba Diving" costs $75 and involves equipment, some brief training, and a 30-40 minute boat dive. If you've never tried scuba, this is the place.

Finally, this was a summer cruise with plenty of moderately priced fares which departed from Galveston. That means families and kids. About 500 of the 2500 were kids. For the most part, there was no problem. Yes, there were a few that ran around unsupervised. Yes, my 13 year old came in 45 minutes after the published curfew and woke me up. And yes, the main pool was jam packed, but for the most part, things were under control. The exceptions were the bubbas mentioned above and a couple of other families. Always remember – the family that drinks together, shouts obnoxiously together. Drunk family A: river of wine and cocktails during every evening meal. By the time, the main course arrived, we couldn’t hear each other above the shouting at the next table. (The single dining room for the whole ship didn’t help the noise level either.) Even though our waiter claimed that alcohol would not be served to those under 18 with or without the parents permission, some of the kids in that family looked under age to us. Angry glares are ignored by inebriated diners.

Drunk family B: “Hey, don’t touch that!” “It’s cool, man. I know what I’m doing.” Only son was attempting to turn down the music during the musicians break so sis could wow us with her rendition of a Mozart piece on the piano. After the real musician shrewdly patronized them and she’d finished her sour-noted minuet, the family retired to their table full of daiquiris and Guiness darks. Then mom hears a song she just has to dance to, so she walks on the furniture and pulls dad out for a songs worth of groping in front of us, the kids, the Almighty and everyone else….and I mean barfly butt groping. Repulsive.

The rest of the week was pleasant and as relaxing as one would hope from a cruise. If you want more peace and quiet, try an all inclusive adults only resort on the Mayan Riviera. If you want more party and lewd behavior, go to Cancun or Daytona. A more refined, elegant vacation? QM2 or Crystal. For a good balance of family atmosphere, decent food, nice accommodations and a fun time, Rhapsody of the seas is a good choice. Take into account that embarking from Galveston might save you plane fare and the cruise price is very reasonable, and this could be an annual thing. Just remember to be patient when you fight the traffic to load your luggage when you get back!