I cannot even begin to address cruising in the Med with two children under two. We never considered taking our children on a cruise till they were 5, and did not start our children on Europe trips until 9. Many ship excursions involve lots of walking or long days on buses (neither good options with infants). Going to places like Pompeii can involve 2 or more hours in extreme heat with virtually no shelter. As to groups of 14 people, trying to arrange private tours for 14 is very difficult since most private tours are in cars or vans....none of which would hold 14. In some places you might be able to arrange for private tours with mini-buses, but we have no personal knowledge of good companies that provide these services. My best advice would be that you consider splitting-up into smaller groups during some of your port days. You definitely need to check with your cruise line as to whether they will even accept kids under 2. Other than that, I have no solution for your issues.